Bottom rung days
I am having one of those bottom rung days and the only way forward means going up. Sitting on the bottom rung is comfortable, it is safe albeit lonely. Everyone else seems far away perched on their crossbars surrounded by clouds. Laughing from their vantage point. Can I climb that high and experience the same joy?
Why do mountains look so awesome from a distance, and yet petrifying close up? The shear stableness of its structure beckons and towers over me. To look at it from afar it seems conquerable, but the closer I get the fear begins to set in. Bottom ladder days are like that.
Taking the first step is scary, it means committing to moving up. To believing in a better goal. This is like writing. The blank page awaiting words, inspiration. It taunts me, saying you can't do this. Climbing the ladder takes courage, great effort and seems completely out of my reach. I can hear the pen laughing. Write if you dare.
Do I dare?
You cannot be a writer if you don't dare. The bottom of the ladder is no place for creativity. Comfortable and safe do not go hand in hand with adventure. So if I want to see the results of my creation I need to climb one step at a time towards the clouds.
I don't like looking down as I climb, it makes me feel dizzy. Looking up and forward gives me an idea of how closer I am getting to my goal. To the joy that others are experiencing on their higher rungs. I hear their cheers as each step brings me nearer, their enthusiasm for my success infectious. I can do this as long as I believe in myself.
Snakes and ladders
There will of course be times of snakes and ladders when I hit a snake, tumbling down and starting again from a new square further down the board. Except this time I know I can climb up again as I have done it before. Bottom rung days will come and go. What is important is that I keep trying and with determination, I will climb that high and experience the same joy.
"But as for you, be strong and courageous, for your work will be rewarded." 2 Chronicles 15:7