Okay so being a late fiftyager has not done anything for my forgetfulness. In fact, it is climbing to new heights. Take for example the other day. Oh, and who are Brawny and Flap?
The evening meal was ready to be dished up
I took out the dinner plates from the cupboard above me. Carefully placing the spaghetti bolognaise on the top one I proceeded to take it into the dining room. As I turned and made a step forward (and this is better if viewed in cartoon form) my eyes suddenly realized that I was about to smash into the cupboard door that I forgot to close.
My head stops within a millimeter of the door
Super emergency brakes Brawny that was close - my body continued, then decided that it would prefer staying attached to my head - indeed Flap. However, the spaghetti bol and plate sailed separately onward and smashed into the wall. - Flying splatter Brawny, that is not good. I closed the cupboard door and moved towards the mess - definitely not good Flap - and slipped on a stray piece of spaghetti ending up on parade alongside the new wall decoration.
The kitchen door began to open - startling entrances Brawny this is not going to end up well.
I yelled, ‘don’t come in’
But a foot connected with the slippery substance and my hubby flew past and crash landed - Flap, I think we have a bad case of slipitus. Not to worry Brawny I will use my cape to boldly go where no man has gone before. Or perhaps not, spag bol would clash with my colour coordinated pants and tights. Maybe Flap, but we have to do something.
A voice came from the other side of the door
"What’s going on?" Trying to warn my daughter that we had a slight problem, I reiterated the warning, "don’t come…." too late. Another body slipped past but this time gracefully recovered gliding along the floor ending up with a ‘ta dar’, arms stretched out in a state of gymnastic pose. - Lightning gymnastics Brawny, she is good. Yes, I think we have our solution Flap.
Extending her hands, a confident spaghetti skater helped me stand up as I wobbled to a high stool. Next, she did the same for my hubby. Next sticky strips of pasta were peeled off the floor and thrown away, the wall quickly washed down, smashed plate pieces collected and dinner once again ready to be dished up. My daughter told me to strip off and frumpy clothes were found for me to change into - Speedy quick thinking Brawny, I think our work is done here. Yes Flap, another successful cleanup. Biff, baff, boff, time to put our feet up.
And the moral of this tale, forgetfulness can be dangerous, so remember friends, don’t leave cupboard doors open.
Now, where have those pesky superhero's gone, I want a word with them.
Labels: accident, bolognaise sauce, dinner, hearing voices, kitchen, meal, slippery floor, spaghetti bolognaise, superhero's, wall decoration